The last 2-3 years i have noticed my anger has elevated quiet a bit. To the point where my gf and my family are kept on their toes. Now i know some anger is always welcomed at certain times when appropriate but my anger seems to come from stress and over stupid little bullshit.
For instance:
I had a 5 skid order come into my place of work today and i was carrying in a decent sized heavy box, and this new kid (that always seems to lollygag around and bullshit instead of doing his work) walks out of my loading dock door and stands there on the cell phone and talk while i sit there with the box.
I tell him "do ya mind" and he replies "sorry brah" then moves and continues on his phone call. Not 3 minutes later the same crap happens.
It got me pretty mad and it carried on through the day.
What im getting at is i believe its stress that is causing me to act like this. My job is very stressful with tons of people pulling at me all at once to get shit done.
My question is, how did you deal with the stress and anger? Music? Write it out? Scream?
I really would rather not lose my relationship with this great girl, and continue to scare my friends and family, but it just seems like i can pop off at any moment with anger. It could be as simple as someone grabbing my arm and telling me to smile.
Thoughts?
BTW this is a serious issue, and im coming to you all because i respect most of your opinions, and most of you are much older and wiser than I.
____________________________________ I'll keep my freedom, my guns, and my money. You can keep your change.
"Texas can make it without the United States. The United States can't make it without Texas." -Sam Houston
"That your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God." -Corinthians 2:5
Music is good, what do you listen to? try some more mellow stuff. I've been on some stuff like 311, slightly stoopid, john mayer, just good relaxing music. Direct your anger at the source when it happens, so you vent it out in small ways and don't let it build up. For ex. tell the kid your gonna go over his head to the boss man if he keeps screwing around like that. Makes you feel better, and helps you get the desired result. I feel you on the stress thing man, between full time school, 30 hours+ of work, family, friends, and a g/f, it wears you down.
Got any activities you really enjoy? For me a great outlet is surfing, I get a bit antsy if I can't surf for too long and it just helps me relax, just something about it makes me feel a lot better. Do you get enough physical activity? Even if your job is physical that doesn't cut it. Try working out, or something. That is another thing that helps me feel better.
^^It's the little things that keep me from losin it hope you can relate to some part of that
^^^ I am with this, dont know if you work out, but really hard lifting to some metal and then cooling down after the workout to some blues or something more laid back helps me. Not trying to get anybody worked up, but I have started going back to chruch, and my wife thinks its help with my anger good luck
____________________________________ Are we safe here?
i used to have bad anger too when i was a team leader in retail. i used to get so mad i'd punch inanimate objects. let that go along time ago, for whatever reason. i started working in corrections and realized that if i blew up and acted stupid it could get me killed by a 250 lb inmate. besides that it's unprofessional to act a fool like that. when you feel it swelling up, either let it go then by telling the guy why it's pissing you off, or step away and calm down.
in your spare time workout, play basketball, shoot guns, etc....
____________________________________ 2000 BAB GT, Procharged, 4.10's, gears, exhaust, speedy dyno tune...Still a 2v though
368 hp
406 lb/ft on 7lbs
Is it just work or everything being piled on you that comes with getting older? I usually think about the consequences before I react, so that tends to help me keep my cool most of the time. Next time that guy is on the phone at work, I would say something to him, or co workers. Plant seeds in their heads that he's lazy, and they will start to notice it too and get on his case. Having kids keeps you restrained too, makes you think 3 times about stuff.
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1986 Buick GN
2004 Mystic Cobra #1182 Mystic #504
mustanginky i hear ya, i actually beat the shit out of a random box, made it worse.
SNCboom: i have thought about that numerous times, but i haven't for the simple fact that my boss has told me he would never drug test me, but i have been injured on the job and thats an immediate drug test.
I have a bit of tempter as well and it has gotten me into trouble. Try taking like 2 or 3 seconds before your react to somthing, it helps alot. Also if this co-worker continues to F up, take him aside, and calmly with conviction tell him what he needs to work on.
And +1 for the gym, it helps you only focus on one thing instead of the stressers.
1. Find a friend and vent, if all else fails, that is why we have SD here
2. Gym, lift weights and burn off some energy which may help reduce stress. I'm sure it has something to do with releasing endorphins in the brain which help make people happy.
3. Music can help but you need to find out what kinds help calm you down, Disturbed and Killswitch Engage actually calm me down.
4. Burning rubber can be therapeutic.
Thats about all i got, aside from killing/burning spiders or other insects.
____________________________________ 2004 Ford Mustang GT
BBK CAI, SCT tuner (custom 93 octane tune), PP 75MM TB/PL, MAC o/r H and catbacks, steeda pullies
Quote:
Originally Posted by LS1pussout
ill take this whole site to judge judy if i have to
I too have really bad anger problems. Especially on a video game or if something electronic like a pos PC messes up.
Try punching something really hard that is really hard. Then you'll quit being so mad at what it was you were mad at, but then you might start being mad at yourself for being so stupid to hurt your hand. It works for me anyway.
Nicotine also works, but I quit smoking.
____________________________________ Born: 9/2/02...# 2512 of 8394
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I used to, well still do have quite a temper, but I have progressed greatly and have learned to control it. It took me losing a great girl to realize how stupid and immature I was acting.
What I do when I feel myself start getting mad is I start thinking really hard. I think about that whatever stupid shit I am about to do is going to get me no where, and probably make matters worse. I take a few deep breathes in the process and everything starts leveling out.
I got anger issues also. I am thinking about taking something to cool me down. I goto the gym, train Muay Thai, etc.. I still get crazy. Get some advice from a professional and take something. You dont want to ruin something good because of anger, I did and its not worth it.
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04 Mystichrome
Built and tuned by HorsepowerByHermann
Lets go Yankees!!!2009
In Memory 9-11-01 Never Forgive
I used to get worked up about just about everything, was always really angry, but one day I just decided, **** it. I dunno what it is but I just don't worry about stupid shit anymore. I no longer get frustrated with stuff that used to make me rip my hair out. Just gotta find that thing that relaxes you.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TCSoff
See what you did johndeeregn you done gone and confused The Stig.
I used to have a huge anger problem, going as far as putting my fists through walls, kicking my cars, leaving knuckle shaped dents in the hood, etc...My answer? I gave it to God. Now, I don't know if you believe in God, or any other higher powers or dieties, but that's what got me through some rather dark and painful times. And, I'm probably gonna sound like a pussy for saying this, but crying helps as well. One of those big, sobbing, racking your body kind of cries, where it both emotionally and physically drains you. It helps. Trust me.
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Last edited by Blade Runner; 11-04-2009 at 01:01 AM.
Pump some iron. When i get really pissed ill pick my guitar up, crank the amp to 7 and play some slayer. Go for a drive. I am a generally happy person so long as i can listen to some metal. Lately ive been mellowing out to the Allman Brothers and some Earl Scruggs Bluegrass. If bluegrass dont mellow you out, then you need Old Crow.
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4 FEB 2006 * 12 OCT 2006
NEVER FORGIVE - NEVER FORGET
Political correctness is about turning a blind eye to painful reality because your comfortable feelings are more important to you than saving lives and providing quality of life to people who work their ass off to be productive and are a benefit to this great American dream.
Don't be that guy no one likes because of his temper. Just chill out, taking things too seriously isn't good for you. Just let situations work themselves out instead of worrying about everything.
First I ask myself what I'm stressed about? Then I think of the best/quickest way to solve the problem. (LOTS of unnecessary stress is created from procrastinating)
-Throughout my day I constantly in my head repeat "no worries".
-Try viewing EVERYTHING in a positive light. (Think half full, not half empty)
-Think about a goal I'm working on and vividly Imagine myself already there.
-Punch a baby
Remember certain types of stress are healthy.
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Truth is treason in the empire of lies.
-Ron Paul