I lost my mom, she was just 58 and my only parent.
- Thread starter L8APEX
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I had a similar fate. I lost my mother when she was 58 as well, and I was 30 at the time. She was sick up to that point, and due to some mistakes made by those who handled her medically, she died completely unexpectedly. We knew she was sick but it wasn't serious, we did not expect her to die. She was transferred to another hospital for specialist treatment and was dead when she arrived.
I can't give you much advice, your religious background may be a strength if you have one.
Live with the memories, she will always be a part of you.
Cherrish that you were able to speak to her before she left. My mother was intubated and drugged up when I seen her last, but I will never forget the last time I seen her. She opened her eyes, looked very clearly into mine and mouthed what I think was "I'm sorry". I'm not sure why... I think she was sad because I was about to get married and she was VERY excited about it, but knew she wouldn't make it.
I did fortunately still get a gift from her on my wedding day which is something I was thrilled to get. It just means so much more to me now.
I can't give you much advice, your religious background may be a strength if you have one.
Live with the memories, she will always be a part of you.
Cherrish that you were able to speak to her before she left. My mother was intubated and drugged up when I seen her last, but I will never forget the last time I seen her. She opened her eyes, looked very clearly into mine and mouthed what I think was "I'm sorry". I'm not sure why... I think she was sad because I was about to get married and she was VERY excited about it, but knew she wouldn't make it.
I did fortunately still get a gift from her on my wedding day which is something I was thrilled to get. It just means so much more to me now.
Very sorry for your loss. To love is to lose. Life can sure be tough sometimes. But it is worth it.
sorry to hear about your loss. My twin brother died a few years back. It is very difficult to see a loved one die right in front of you knowing there is absolutely nothing that you can do about it. my heart goes out to you and your family. I know your mother was proud of you and it sounds like she was an amazing woman. I hope she rests in peace and I hope the best for you and your family. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think about my brother and wish that he was still here. So I agree hug your loved ones since life is delicate. My condolences to you. Hang in there dude.
Sorry for your loss OP. Can't imagine what it's like to lose a parent that young. Plenty of people to talk to on here if need be.
I've been dealing with this for about two weeks now, lost her early Tuesday morning on the 23rd. It was not expected at all. She had been having trouble keeping food down since November and the Dr's took their sweet time sending her to a specialist. They ran a scope though her GI tract in early Feb. everything looked fine (there was some diverticulitis which is normal).
This was her 3rd time in the hospital in as many weeks because she'd get dehydrated and her potassium and sodium levels would drop. Took her in on Friday and by sunday she was wanting a razor and pj's. Something happened monday morning, she ended up falling and was moved to ICU. Her blood pressure dropped and they administered meds to get her pressure back up. I got there a bit after 4 and now her Potassium and other electrolytes are way too high and they are looking at doing emergency dialysis, just before they started her levels started coming down as the got a central line in her and her kidneys started filtering. between each step I'm signing forms like i'm applying for top secret security clearance. The ICU nurse noticed that her breathing was getting shallow and she had to be intubated. At the same time she noticed her abdomen was becoming descended and there was a lot of crap getting sucked from her. They decided that they needed to do emergency exploratory surgery at 2 am. They suspected a blockage or some small problem. The Surgeon came out to me at ~3am and said her "entire" bowel was dead, there was nothing they could do.
They took her back to her icu room and I remember her telling me I don't ever want to be hooked up to machines. So I asked that they remove it.
My little sister lives in Denver, I called her told her to talk to mom (even though she wasn't responsive) and I sat next to my mom, the lady who raised two kids on her own and was the toughest person I know, and spent the next 40 -60 minutes telling her it was ok. It was time for her to go, anything I could tell her to put her soul at ease.
I kept it up until she slipped away around 5:30 tues morning. I stayed with her for over an hour so friends and family that had showed up could get their peace because as soon as I left they wouldn't allow anyone else to see her. I had to name a funeral home before I could leave as well. As the sun started to rise tuesday morning I left, went home and showered and tried to sleep.
I've made it through the funeral a week ago sat, and I got her ashes Friday evening. She was so claustrophobic she did not want to be in a box. I'm still not sleeping and unfortunately she did not have a will so I am having to go through all sorts of legal hoops trying to settle her estate, hoping that I'll be able to keep the house and take care of her 2 little dogs that were so loyal. You just never expect to lose your only parent at 32, and we were very close, we even worked at the same company.
Just make sure to tell the ones that are special to you that you love them every chance you get. And make sure your affairs are in order for your loved ones, god forbid.
http://obits.dignitymemorial.com/dignity-memorial/obituary.aspx?n=Lee-
Waples&lc=4071&pid=177835680&mid=6817751&locale=en_US
So sorry to hear this. She sounded like a great woman. Honor her by doing the right things in life and live by what she taught you. Keep your head up as best as you can and life will take you where you need to be.
Man that just sux OP ... sorry about what happened. I lost my Dad in July of last year after being ill but active for a long time. Mom passed in January quite suddenly. They say she had a stroke she was fine on Wed and dead on Saturday. At least you got to say good bye .. take some comfort there ... I didn't get to do that with either of my parents and it sux
Sorry to hear about your loss, our condolences to you and your family. I think it was great the way you stayed with her all the way. And sad as it is, I'm glad you got to be there with her when the time came. Too many of us never get the chance to say goodbye, at least you did get that. And not everyone gets to die with loving family there to comfort them, at least your mother did get that, you were there to give her that comfort.
Sorry for your loss. I lost my Dad/BFF 8/10/15 and it's been crazy ever since. He did have a will and left a bunch of things to me but my loving step-mother wants to make a huge fight out of it so I feel your pain on the Estate side of things.
04SVT. I'm with ya man, after things like this happen there is a period of "I don't give a shit" and "do what makes you feel good". Unfortunately, booze and food comfort me so I put on some weight, too.
Good luck with everything OP!
04SVT. I'm with ya man, after things like this happen there is a period of "I don't give a shit" and "do what makes you feel good". Unfortunately, booze and food comfort me so I put on some weight, too.
Good luck with everything OP!
My mom found my dad when he died in 1997 face down as well, and like your mom, she was never the same afterward. I met my wife a month after he passed and I regretted two things, he not getting to meet him and her not getting to know the mom I grew up with. My mom never got over it until she passed three years ago.
Thank you all for all the prayers and condolences!
Unfortunately last night I found out that there is no way to avoid selling the house, her mustang, and now we are looking at having an estate sale... which is going to be hell for me since I'm a sentimental fool.
My little sister is in Denver and won't be able to help much aside from picking things she wants to keep over the phone, then I'm guessing they will likely end up the storage locker I'll rent. I doubt they will ever make the trip to her new house in Castle Rock, but I don't have it in me to fight over silly things right now.
At least I've found a home for her 2 pups, with one of her good friends who was around them allot. I can't keep them at my apartment, and it'd be about $3k to break the lease. They were too loyal to my mom to just give them away.
There is just so much to do and no time to do it...
Unfortunately last night I found out that there is no way to avoid selling the house, her mustang, and now we are looking at having an estate sale... which is going to be hell for me since I'm a sentimental fool.
My little sister is in Denver and won't be able to help much aside from picking things she wants to keep over the phone, then I'm guessing they will likely end up the storage locker I'll rent. I doubt they will ever make the trip to her new house in Castle Rock, but I don't have it in me to fight over silly things right now.
At least I've found a home for her 2 pups, with one of her good friends who was around them allot. I can't keep them at my apartment, and it'd be about $3k to break the lease. They were too loyal to my mom to just give them away.
There is just so much to do and no time to do it...
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Do it one thing at a time. This is not going to be a quick process. My father was a procrastinator and had no will or life insurance so my brother and I are dealing with his. Hopefully your mom was more organized.
My condolences buddy, stay strong and live the rest of your life to the fullest, for her.
My condolences as well. My mom is the same age, and is my only parent as well. Your mom lives on in you and your sister.
It's not much, but there is a Dr Seuss quote that helps me when I lose someone close: Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.
It's not much, but there is a Dr Seuss quote that helps me when I lose someone close: Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.
i lost my dad 4 years ago, 22 years old. im sorry
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