its been many years for me but i think (in my case) that i still havent returned to normal. how long did it take for you to get your life back to normal emotionally?
Afgan/Iraq vets: how long until normal?
- Thread starter KingBlack
- Start date
Normal? LOL! Define your normal. After 27 years of active duty I have a hard time doing that. I like to deploy and always raise my hand even when the job sucks. Emotions are an individual strength or weakness (don't take that too negatively we are all different). I keep my professional life at work. I long ago learned to separate my private life. The trauma of seeing close friends die really or just living knowing the next minute you can die isn't easy. don;t get me wrong. i just don't think there is a template for any single one of us.
I deal with it all by making the best of every day. Even outside of war I have learned that life can be short. So why be miserable? Why reflect on the negative, life is too short to be miserable. I like to fish, race cars on road courses, and enjoy watching my kids grow and my grown kids do the right adult things. Stay occupied, keep your mind and soul or consciousness looking forward. the past is done. Don't enslave yourself to it, but do not ignore its lessons. The worse thing you can to is drink or drug your past away. It will haunt you forever and destroy your life.
Watch more porn?
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It depends on the individual. I know guys that are still not the same 7 years after the invasion. It took me about a year to really start to come back to normal. But some things never go away. Every new house, building street etc that I walk down I can't help but think of MOUT. I have a detailed plan for my house should I be here during a home invasion. I have weapons and mags stashed at various points in the house and my body armor is readily available 2 feet from my bed. Every new place I go I always look for the nearest exits and develope a quick evacuation plan in my head. Personally I think these are things that can be considered normal for those of us in a combat arms MOS anyway so I'm not concerned about it. I love living and I love my friends and family. I'm not depressed anymore so I feel I'm "normal" again.
Dunno man. Im not. Probably never will be. But who decides whats normal anyways? you do. My great uncle was in 1st ID and a liberator of one of the Concentration camps during WWII, up until he died this year he said he still had very vivid nightmares of combat and at times when he was alone he would have flashbacks during daytime.
I didn't have to pull my trigger in defense and didn't have to see up close anyone killed while I was there. I knew a good number of people that were KIA. Had some pretty intense situations, but it never escalated. I know a good number of people on this site have experienced WAY more than I.
What I had to get used to was actually sleeping again and ****in Americans. The sleep was due to my FOB getting mortared and rocketed all the time (thank god they had bad aim…..) and just getting used to falling into deep sleep again. The Americans part was the fact that while I was in Astan damn near everyone was very polite and helpful to each other (<200 man FOB). But when I got back every mother ****er I ran into was a complete ****ing douche nozzle. I just had to get used to it again. The American part only took me about a month to fall back into, but sleep took the greater part of 10 months and some ambien.
What I had to get used to was actually sleeping again and ****in Americans. The sleep was due to my FOB getting mortared and rocketed all the time (thank god they had bad aim…..) and just getting used to falling into deep sleep again. The Americans part was the fact that while I was in Astan damn near everyone was very polite and helpful to each other (<200 man FOB). But when I got back every mother ****er I ran into was a complete ****ing douche nozzle. I just had to get used to it again. The American part only took me about a month to fall back into, but sleep took the greater part of 10 months and some ambien.
I dont think anyone that was seen combat will ever be the same person they where before they where there. From my experiancees I have changed the way i do things i always think about things the dreams still come back every now and then. But like everyone else i try to live a day at a time and try to make the best of life.
It's part of the game man. I'm not the same person I was when I left, and I know I never will be. I think I'm pretty close, but it's taken 6 years, therapy and medication. Still can't do groups, bars and many other things that I used to do, but I get a bit better everyday. You'll never be able to shut it off all the way I think.
Sad thing is, I get in uniform, I'm back in my comfort zone and everything's great. Guess that's the definition of PTSD to a tee eh?
Best advice I can give is if it's been longer than you think is a reasonable amount of time, go talk to someone. No shame.
Sad thing is, I get in uniform, I'm back in my comfort zone and everything's great. Guess that's the definition of PTSD to a tee eh?
Best advice I can give is if it's been longer than you think is a reasonable amount of time, go talk to someone. No shame.
what the hell is normal, lol. after 2 tours to OIF, and 1 to OEF, I sure as hell can't tell you!
There is no normal!
Me personally I still have issues from the horrible stuff I've seen in the streets of DC in the late 80s early 90s as a young man.
So to go over to the desert and see the same evil stuff us humans can do to each other wasn't anything new.
You have Vets like Dale who are in high leadership positions who always have to portray a positive strong willing demeanor. If all of his subordinates see and feel he is mentally and emotionally unstable then who will reassure them in tight and critical situations? The big dog loses it and so will guys under him.
So you have guys like this who have to stay strong for our troops no matter what their personal problems they have themselves. That's why these guys wear the most stripes.....emotional and mental endurance!!
Some things have really changed my perception of life and Im sure many others can vouch for this.....the distinct sound of a C-RAM alarm will still make me do the same things I was trained to do back then, something that I will never forget or get used to for the rest of my life.
We had a guy with the C-RAM alarm as his ringtone on his cell phone in my civilian department and he thought it was funny thing, after a good personal talk with him he no longer had it on his phone.
Think of some of the young children of Iraq and Afghan they will never ever forget the stuff they have seen from our Allied Forces and the insurgents. That's where the damage is done and these young ages where you observe everything as a young child with a developing mind. I would never want my daughter to experience or see what some of the children in the desert had to, that's why we fight!!!!
To keep the war off of our soil and away from our children to see!
God Bless our Troops and please support our VA!
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Took me about 6 months to not be completely bonkers haha but like a lot of these guys said you won't be the same person you were before you left.
Did two tours in Iraq with 4th ID as infantry. I feel normal. I have a hard time understanding how so many other people don't. Guess everyone is different.
Everyone is different.
You could shoot my sister in the head and I'd smile.
I could shoot your sister (for convo sake) in the head and you'd be devastated.
haj= :burn: = ME
Totally get you on that.
I've always been good at thinking that now I'm back, its no big deal. For instance, when I was home I would be driving and see some trash and think "in Iraq that would probably blow up," and keep driving.
When I was stoplossed, I loathed going back outwardly, but there was a small little voice inside that was happy to put boots on ground and start pounding sand.
Thats what i was told by the docs when i got stop lossed. 4 out of the 5 guys i knew that got stop lossed were KIA at the end of our first shot. Naturally i thought i was going to be cursed as well and i went and talked to the behavioral health guys and told them how i felt. I really really did not want to go again, but once we got rolling it felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders
I remember hearing stories about people coming back from deployments all ****ed up and ducking when they heard a loud noise and all that. I remember right before my 1st unit came back from Iraq we where told not to sneak up behind anyone or tap them on the shoulder because it could cause them to panic and all that.
I went over to Iraq twice, I was a gunner, worked ECP and was on the PSD team. I saw alot and did alot. But I never had nightmares, never hit the deck or anything.
But just like Tractorman said, when I drive and see trash on the road I think in my head "if this was Iraq that could be a IED". I understand the difference between Iraq and the United States and I know not to act the same.
Why people do is something I never understand.
But yes it is completely up to the person on recovery time. It didnt take me long at all to be back to normal.
The only thing Ive noticed is I get very inpatiant with people, Traffic sets me off a little sometimes and I hate stupid people. But I think thats just being part of the military and living a face paced life. Im about to be heading to Afgan for 12 months so we will see how that adds ontop of my 2 tours to Iraq.
I went over to Iraq twice, I was a gunner, worked ECP and was on the PSD team. I saw alot and did alot. But I never had nightmares, never hit the deck or anything.
But just like Tractorman said, when I drive and see trash on the road I think in my head "if this was Iraq that could be a IED". I understand the difference between Iraq and the United States and I know not to act the same.
Why people do is something I never understand.
But yes it is completely up to the person on recovery time. It didnt take me long at all to be back to normal.
The only thing Ive noticed is I get very inpatiant with people, Traffic sets me off a little sometimes and I hate stupid people. But I think thats just being part of the military and living a face paced life. Im about to be heading to Afgan for 12 months so we will see how that adds ontop of my 2 tours to Iraq.
Not sure where I heard it but it goes something like this, "there's no such thing as a normal life.... there's just life."
Everyone has their own methods. I've gone twice to Iraq and twice to the Stan. What works for me is just chilling with the family, playing with my cars- going to shows etc., PT, PT, PT.... and just taking stuff as it comes. Don't force anything. I'm usually back to my "old self" within 10 days.... that's mostly getting over jetlag!!!.
It's different for everyone. I'd say just relax- do stuff that you love to do, hang out with people you like and don't dwell on the negative. If you don't feel "normal" after that, talk to a professional. No need to be miserable when there is tons of help out there for the asking.
GL
Everyone has their own methods. I've gone twice to Iraq and twice to the Stan. What works for me is just chilling with the family, playing with my cars- going to shows etc., PT, PT, PT.... and just taking stuff as it comes. Don't force anything. I'm usually back to my "old self" within 10 days.... that's mostly getting over jetlag!!!.
It's different for everyone. I'd say just relax- do stuff that you love to do, hang out with people you like and don't dwell on the negative. If you don't feel "normal" after that, talk to a professional. No need to be miserable when there is tons of help out there for the asking.
GL
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