Eat...
Suguoi's - Garlic Chicken
Ethel's - Mochico Chicken and Tataki
Leonard's - Malasadas
Da' Kitchen - all ono
Jung Shave Ice on King Street
Makai Market - a little of everything
It's awesome and it sucks at the same time. Lived there all of '03 and '04. Your car will most likely get F'd up if it's nice and you'll have some serious prejudice from locals since you're military. I personally loved it there but there are a lot of unhappy locals. I was lucky enough to slip under the radar since all locals thought I was a "Portugue," or Rob Machado lol.
I'll add some of my spots: Boston's pizza in Kaimuki is really good. Teddy's Burgers on Monsurat as well, heard they might have moved. Sharks cove on North Shore is far better snorkling.. but it's big wave season up there right now.
Most my Hawaii info relates to surfing so might be totally irrelevent.
BTW stay the hell away from "Public's Beach" and especially the bathrooms there. Biggest gay free-for-all I've ever encountered. There's an excellent surf spot right out in front of it.. figures lmao