Help understanding this message

[PilledV8s]

Hey Fellas, I need help with understanding this message. I pretty much know what it means, but my psyche is in denial because I don't want it to be the truth. This has been bothering me for over a week now. This girl I've been dating brought out some skeletons from her past. Apparently she used to talk to an aquaintence of mine, but I met her before I met him. I couldn't talk to her because I was with someone else at the time and when this girl and me started dating, a week later I became aquainted with him, met him through a buddy of mine. Well just last week she tells me this: "I used to see the guy (your aquaintence) on a personal but not serious level....if you know what I mean" she said she didn't really feel the need to tell me because it was before me. So I'm thinking they used to be F buddies b/c of the word "personal", but I'm having a difficult time accepting it. Does this seem accurate? Does my inference seem correct?

We got into a big argument about this, but she had some valid points which were more prevailant than mine. One of her points she mentioned was that her past was her past and it was before me and her past should not reflect on or alter what is now.

 

[CSD]

So I'm thinking they used to be F buddies b/c of the word "personal", but I'm having a difficult time accepting it. Does this seem accurate? Does my inference seem correct?

Yes.

The bigger question here is why did she feel the need to bring this to your attention.

 

[Sniperdog]

she is right.,., the past has no change, just your acceptance :shrug:

Yes.

The bigger question here is why did she feel the need to bring this to your attention.

better she tells him vs. the other guy saying.,., "I used to tap that all the time"

 

[greenstang1313]

unless she's cheating on you who cares?

 

[CSD]

better she tells him vs. the other guy saying.,., "I used to tap that all the time"

If I were the friend I would never say anything to begin with.

If I were the OP I would rather not be informed of what happened in the past. This would in effect turn me off and walk away from said relationship.

Whatever happened to leaving the past in the past? :shrug:

 

[Thump_rrr]

If I were the friend I would never say anything to begin with.

If I were the OP I would rather not be informed of what happened in the past. This would in effect turn me off and walk away from said relationship.

Whatever happened to leaving the past in the past? :shrug:

It may be common knowledge to other people that they hang around with.
If it is brought up early on in the relationship by her it becomes a non issue in the bigger scheme of things.
If it comes to light 6 months later through a 3rd party it will apper that she was trying to hide it from him and there may have been other underlying issues.
I'm sure he had no reason to believe that he was dating the Virgin Mary.

 

[NO-BlkLightning2K]

"tell her i said waddup back."

 

[Bankstitan]

hate to be blunt, but your friend stuff her like a turkey.(my conclusion) its the past, move on or find another chick.

also, if a chick told me she banged this dude and that guy, i would def look at her different. Maybe even just walk out. I understand she had prior relationships but sharing the sexual details is a total turn off.

 

[Sniperdog]

It may be common knowledge to other people that they hang around with.
If it is brought up early on in the relationship by her it becomes a non issue in the bigger scheme of things.If it comes to light 6 months later through a 3rd party it will apper that she was trying to hide it from him and there may have been other underlying issues.
I'm sure he had no reason to believe that he was dating the Virgin Mary.

my point :thumbsup: better to hear from her than from others.

 

[Sinister04L]

Yeah she rode him like a hobby horse. Who cares? No need to argue, it happened before you were together.

 

[Co-brat]

yeah, they were F-buddies. Oh well, didnt you have some F-buddies too? I would just get over it, not the end of the world.

 

[91frppgt]

werd x2!

 

[PilledV8s]

yeah, they were F-buddies. Oh well, didnt you have some F-buddies too? I would just get over it, not the end of the world.

Yea I have, her co-worker's sister and her another one of her co-workers. I guess there are skeletons I should get out too, before they backfire on me, huh.

 

[Riddla]

The guy did some major hardore PIIHB. I would walk away


and PICS OR BAN!

 

[CSD]

It may be common knowledge to other people that they hang around with.
If it is brought up early on in the relationship by her it becomes a non issue in the bigger scheme of things.
If it comes to light 6 months later through a 3rd party it will apper that she was trying to hide it from him and there may have been other underlying issues.
I'm sure he had no reason to believe that he was dating the Virgin Mary.

my point :thumbsup: better to hear from her than from others.

The past is the past for a reason. Why are the two of you letting the past control your present and/or future? Do you not test drive a few cars before you settle with one? Like the OP's girl mentioned, the past should not alter or have an influence on the present. Why bring it up for discussion?

And yes this same situation happened to me last year. Was dating a girl for six months when a fellow recruit from the academy said to me, "do you know (insert name here) dated your girl?" I was like ok, that's cool but she's with me now so I don't care.

Are we seeing the light at the end of the tunnel yet?

 

[blinelaxd27]

just remember when ur chowin on her taco... he was plowin that... over and over and over... ;-) sweet dreams lol

 

[Bankstitan]

The past is the past for a reason. Why are the two of you letting the past control your present and/or future? Do you not test drive a few cars before you settle with one? Like the OP's girl mentioned, the past should not alter or have an influence on the present. Why bring it up for discussion?

And yes this same situation happened to me last year. Was dating a girl for six months when a fellow recruit from the academy said to me, "do you know (insert name here) dated your girl?" I was like ok, that's cool but she's with me now so I don't care.

Are we seeing the light at the end of the tunnel yet?

even though i agree w/ you about hte past being the past and shouldn't be brought up..i personally,as the guy inthe relationship, think its important. if the girl is sucking more then a hoover vac, thats something to worry about. Past or not. The past is evidence of your presonality/character. Although i know people can change, but 90 % of the time, the change is only for a few months and they are back to their original habbits. IF its something small, i wouldn't worry about it, but if its something like what the OP mentioned, i would def investigate further and try to figure out how many back seats she's been in. then make your decision

 

[canibus]

she told you because she felt you needed to know, this chick digs you. otherwise she would never had said anything. you have no right fighting with her over HER past. if it bothers you that much, end it.

 

[CSD]

even though i agree w/ you about hte past being the past and shouldn't be brought up..i personally,as the guy inthe relationship, think its important. if the girl is sucking more then a hoover vac, thats something to worry about. Past or not. The past is evidence of your presonality/character. Although i know people can change, but 90 % of the time, the change is only for a few months and they are back to their original habbits. IF its something small, i wouldn't worry about it, but if its something like what the OP mentioned, i would def investigate further and try to figure out how many back seats she's been in. then make your decision

I can see where you're coming from. Some good points.

this chick digs you.

This is true.

 

[upside]

you think your friends d!ck is bigger than yours. thats the real problem