Typical Politics

fearmenot

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I saw this on another site. Quite funny. Enjoy!!!


Why did the chicken cross the road?



BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for
change! The chicken wanted change!



SARAH PALIN: Where's my shotgun?



JOHN MCCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he
recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.



HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that
little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified
to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.


GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.
We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not.
The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.



DICK CHENEY: Where's my shotgun?


COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the
satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.



BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your
definition of chicken?



AL GORE: I invented the chicken.



JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am
now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the
chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.



AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black
chickens.




DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize
that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it
goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is
help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current
problems before adding new problems.



OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is
why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken
learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to
give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not
live his life like the rest of the chickens.



ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but
we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.



NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can
see it in his eyes and the way he walks.



PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.



JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the
plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that
chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal
media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.' That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as
that.


BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only
cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance
your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This
new platform is much more stable and will never reboot.


ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road
move beneath the chicken?



COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
 

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