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Adjusting to Civilian Life

Discussion in 'Road Side Pub' started by mysticsvt, Sep 27, 2019.

  1. FJohnny

    FJohnny Well-Known Member Established Member

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    Good one. You had me going for a moment there. That hypocrite comment is a pretty good one to fire someone up. Maybe I can be a little clearer.

    The man served twenty years for his country. Yes, I think he deserves our gratitude, respect and to be treated with dignity for that. If you think otherwise, it's a free country. More power to you.

    No one can be given happiness from someone else. That's on them. But I think the man has earned it and hope he can find the means to that end for himself. And if there is anything anyone can do to make his journey easier then it's a good thing.

    As far as the 'nobody owes you anything but what they agreed to give you' stuff..... Well, thank God that America is not made up of people who all believe that. The most generous nation on earth gives more of everything to more people than any other country in the world. It's amazing, it's inspiring and it's the right thing to do. I get that there will always be people that think they should take care of only themselves and that's okay. As long as there are enough other people to step up and extend a hand when someone needs it we will always make out okay. And one day when you need an assist I hope help is there for you as well.

    I wish you all the best.
     
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  2. Makobra

    Makobra Mostly Peaceful Established Member

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    yeah? I bet you're about to assert that charity is owed.

    oh THERE it is. you aren't talking about what people are OWED you're talking about CHARITY. the fact that nobody owes you anything (and they don't) is the very BASIS for the significance of charity.

    This is what the socialists get wrong and its why their countries fail time and time again while nations like america that are built largely on the idea that you get what you put in regularly bail them out. this goes for america's attic especially.
     
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  3. FJohnny

    FJohnny Well-Known Member Established Member

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    LOL. How exactly did you do that?

    Took a thread about a guy hoping to get some useful insights into his personal situation and turned it into an anti socialism rant where you make it clear you don't owe anyone anything, especially charity. I'm completely okay with that. Do whatever makes you happy. It's the benefit of living in a relatively free society.

    What I actually assert is that OP and people like him have all done their bit to protect the ability of opinionated A-holes like you and me to spout whatever and do whatever we want to. Because of this invaluable service they have so willingly provided I'm asserting that they deserve our admiration, thanks and any help possible to adjust as OP detailed.

    Don't worry, I'm not saying you owe it. I get that you're not into that.

    Not really clear on why you have to bail out your attic although I've heard of the flooding in Texas. Bailing is hard and I hope people helped you with the job. Not because they owed you.

    Anyways, maybe we can just agree to disagree? You owe me that. (Just kidding. You owe me nothing.)

    Have a good day. I'm off to golf so I will, too. We deserve it!
     
  4. Makobra

    Makobra Mostly Peaceful Established Member

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    oh that wasn't anti socialism, it was anti-what-fuels-socialism and if your philosophical disposition is infected with that garbage, well, i can't help that. confusing WAGES and CHARITY is stupid. don't do it. a wage is what you are owed. charity is what you've been graciously given. get it right. or don't. that's your problem.
     
  5. mysticsvt

    mysticsvt southernmustangandford Premium Member Established Member

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    I'm good, everybody good? I don't expect anything for the record. I appreciate those who give respect to those who served, I give respect to those who have served. My Grandfather served, my dad a Marine did two years in Vietnam and was destroyed internally for it. This post wasn't something I would have normal if ever put out there. I did and I got what I needed and a good but of criticism to go along with it but I can process all that. As I said it was just asking for insight on how other's dealt with the transition. I appreciate everyone's input regardless of what was said. I hope, that when everyone has a day like I had, that someone is there for them. Honestly.
     
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  6. 97desertCobra

    97desertCobra Procharged! Established Member

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    You sound like an E-4 on a Disgruntled Veterans FB post.

    OP, your gonna have to come to terms with the fact that the civilian sector is worlds different from the military. You’ve been out for a bit so maybe what you are experiencing is a longing for something familiar. Maybe get involved in a veterans group? Perhaps a non profit that helps other veterans?

    It was said earlier that you need a hobby and I agree. Something besides just a car. Something to bridge that gap between work and relaxation. Give a little bit of purpose besides the normal grind.

    I’ve been in the NG for 16 years so I see both ends. For some people the military becomes synonymous with their personal identity and once they leave the military it gets real hard to adjust. My military service doesn’t define who I am. It’s a big part of my life and has had a monumental impact on my life but it’s not what makes me, me.
     
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  7. 97desertCobra

    97desertCobra Procharged! Established Member

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    The attitude towards civilians is not taught but it definitely permeates throughout the military. In my experience it’s largely prevalent in the combat arms fields as they already hold themselves in higher regard compared to the support jobs. And infantry hold themselves higher than all of combat arms. It’s all stupid bullshit. An infantryman is no better than a fueler. The jobs are different but they both serve. One is inherently more dangerous, the other slightly more useful outside the military. Neither is better than a civilian who never served. Just different paths people took in life.
     
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  8. gimmie11s

    gimmie11s Don’t be an idiot Established Member

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    He's 46.

    OP do you have an kids?
     
  9. gimmie11s

    gimmie11s Don’t be an idiot Established Member

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    This x 1 million! Such a great post right here.

    Why is it that most military folks are the first to talk about their ultimate mental and physical bad assery, yet they have such high rates of PTSD and inability to "adapt to civilian life".... LMFAO.. whatever that means.

    Some of you guys need to get over your god damn selves and as was said above, make yourself relevant to this "new world" of inferior civilians once you get out.
     
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  10. ssj4sadie

    ssj4sadie Well-Known Member Premium Member Established Member

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    LoL! OK, weekend warrior.
     
  11. 97desertCobra

    97desertCobra Procharged! Established Member

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    If only it was truly just one weekend a month. Got 60+ days of training this year, not including the weekend drills. Next year should be about the same if not more.
     
  12. Klaus

    Klaus Premium Member Premium Member Established Member

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    "You think that you DESERVE to be happy? What makes you so special? We live and then we die. Get over yourself."

    ~my badass grandmother
     
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  13. _Snake_

    _Snake_ Well-Known Member Established Member

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    Some of us get it, but it doesn’t seem you do.

    What branch were you in?
     
  14. gimmie11s

    gimmie11s Don’t be an idiot Established Member

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    Ah hahaha. yes.. the ol "you never served so you suck" approach.

    Nice touch.
     
  15. ZEN357

    ZEN357 Active Member Established Member

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    Have you thought about seeing a therapist? I did for my PTSD and it did wonders for me and my mental health.
     
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  16. mysticsvt

    mysticsvt southernmustangandford Premium Member Established Member

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    So you have an ignorant opinion...say it isn't so.
     
  17. 97desertCobra

    97desertCobra Procharged! Established Member

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    That’s not it, it’s that your criticizing something for which you have no experience in and can’t properly understand.

    Someone can be very physically fit and mentally tough yet still suffer from PTSD. Having PTSD does not mean someone is weak. I don’t suffer from PTSD and I consider myself lucky. Everyone processes shared experiences differently. Even though we were in the same firefight just a few feet from each other. Some of my comrades recall feeling hopeless in combat and that feeling of terror has had a lasting effect on them.
     
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  18. BigFatMatt

    BigFatMatt Ain't never gonna change Established Member

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    I wouldn't say he has an ignorant opinion, I'd say he has a (somewhat harsh) civilian's opinion.... are you only looking for responses from people in the military, or from civilians as well?

    My younger brother is a pilot in the Air Force, I am a civilian and I can see first hand how he has changed since joining the military. For us civilians, the closest thing I can compare it to is a fraternity. All of his buds have the same attitude, act the same, and for the most part only hang out with each other and talk about military stuff. When I partied with him a couple times it always felt like his friends were anxious and nervous talking to me about my "normal stuff" like my job, my family, etc... just normal shit civilians talk about every day.

    He definitely drinks a lot more liquor than I do (and I'm no lightweight) so that does concern me some about his health. Lots of guys in the military drink to get drunk on a regular basis it seems.

    It has to be a hard transition leaving the military for a job in the civilian world because now everyone acts differently, has different opinions, different social circles... you can't talk about the same things when you socialize because no one will know what the hell you're talking about. I can see how it would be rough.

    My brother has never had a "real" job in his life. He finished pilot training as soon as he graduated from college and has been flying ever since. He's extremely smart and studious and made straight As in college, but he's never had to work for a civilian boss and be the "low man" on the totem pole before. I'm not sure if he would transition very well. He's the kind of guy who seems to enjoy a very structured lifestyle.

    I'm extraordinarily proud of him and what he's accomplished, and he's an very hard worker so I'm sure these traits will benefit him post-military. I'm just worried about the lack of structure after he's done, and if he will be able to adjust to something completely unfamiliar to him after all the years of routine.
     
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  19. mysticsvt

    mysticsvt southernmustangandford Premium Member Established Member

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    @BigFatMatt
    Awesome post and I appreciate it. Pretty much hit the nail on the head for me. You get to see it first hand even if it isn't you directly going through it. It's just way different and affects us differently as mentioned earlier. Those who see more "shit" for lack of better terms could understandably have more issues to deal with. My mother talks about how my Dad was before and after Vietnam in the Marines. My uncles talk about his much of a baddass he was and they are some pretty serious guys themselves. When he came back they say he was dead inside, withdrawn in every aspect. I can't compare my career to his however, understandable...atleast to some. I appreciate your brother's service and glad to see you do as well.
     
    Last edited: Oct 2, 2019
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  20. _Snake_

    _Snake_ Well-Known Member Established Member

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    Although it would fit your narrative I didn't say you suck, nor was I going to.

    However, you do have a very strong (and inaccurate) opinion for someone who doesn't have the same life experiences.
     

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