Been a lot of relationship advice lately. Now I need some

[lucheski]

Quite interesting.....

David DeAngelo - Attraction isn't a choice - video seminar
David DeAngelo - Advanced Series (2nd Edition) - 1 -
David DeAngelo - Advanced Series (2nd Edition) - 2 -
David DeAngelo - Advanced Series (2nd Edition) - 3 -
David DeAngelo - Advanced Series (2nd Edition) - 4 -
David DeAngelo - Advanced Series (2nd Edition) - 5 -
David DeAngelo - Advanced Series (2nd Edition) - 6 -

 

[chucknorris289]

You need to stop feeling sorry for yourself. That is EXACTLY what she wants. Go out and do stuff and be social, and she'll realize you're not a wreck without her, and the gear will start turning in her head.

 

[MIDNIGHT5.0]

wow man i know how you feel bro im goin through somethin very similar

 

[LS2GTO]

Didn't read the whole post, or any of the replies, but once I got to her saying she can't talk because she said so I knew. She's most likely talking to some other dude and doesn't need your attention anymore and needs her space (to be with this guy).

Girls don't just do this stuff to 'figure out themselves'. They figure out some other dude's junk is what they're doing, especially 23 year old ones that are now working as a bartender.

 

[Tylerc]

She now holds all the power in the relationship, what you should have done instead of begging her to come back was to call her bluff and and ignore her. If she never called or tried to get in contact of you then you would know the relationship is dead.

She has 0 respect for you and respect is everything in a relationship. Your only option is to move on now, and do what the others have said starting by boxing her shit up and go do things to get your mind of her.

And she probably will come back and say what a terrible mistake she has made. Don't allow her to come back because she knows she can walk all over you for whatever she wants. Once respect is gone your not going to get it back.

 

[ColorMatched]

Been in a relationship for 5 years and she's only 23? Sounds to me like she wants to get out and experience all the things she's missed out on since 18 and doesn't want to be held back.

You need to decide if you're going to go along for the ride, or accept it and move along. Once women make their mind up, that's how it will stay,

 

[highdensity007]

Sorry to hear OP. These things happen man, people change. You said you had been together for 5 years and considering both of your ages now, this is not uncommon. She may have felt like she needed to change the direction in her life, to find herself a little more, experience new things, meet different people, etc.


From what I read, just let it go. I know, easier said than done. Been through it before, I'm sure plenty of dudes here have too. It'll make you stronger in the end. Take what you learned from the relationship with her and apply the positive to the next. Good luck and hang in there, time will be your friend to get over this.

 

[Tabres]

I was thinking about that, she doesn't have family here and with the holidays coming up it'll be pretty painful for her

Not your problem. She's obviously made her choice, let her live with it.

If I were you I wouldn't continue to waste my time with this girl. Life is too short for that kind of garbage behavior.

 

[Jaysin]

Ditch the bitch an PIIT(Tanya)B

THIS! Best advice in this thread thus far. Her mind has been made up, best thing you can do is cut her out of your life, and just get out and enjoy yourself. No use in crying or thinking about someone who wants nothing to do with you. Women are crazy.

 

[ponyboyisaac]

Sorry to hear OP. These things happen man, people change. You said you had been together for 5 years and considering both of your ages now, this is not uncommon. She may have felt like she needed to change the direction in her life, to find herself a little more, experience new things, meet different people, etc.


From what I read, just let it go. I know, easier said than done. Been through it before, I'm sure plenty of dudes here have too. It'll make you stronger in the end. Take what you learned from the relationship with her and apply the positive to the next. Good luck and hang in there, time will be your friend to get over this.[/QUOTE]

Quoted for the truth.


Its funny that she wants to party it up now that shes working at a bar. She saw the grass greener on the other side but with time she will realize what she had with you was real and that the grass wasnt greener after all.
People will sometimes trade a faithful loving relationship for some thrills only to realize later on that it wasnt worth it at all.

Mark my words she will be sorry, but in all honesty you should move on. She is the one making the mistake not you.

If she ever comes crawling back saying she's sorry, tell her you forgive her, but you cant be with her. There are some mistakes in life that have consequences that cannot be changed.

Dont get me wrong, I'm all for forgiveness but I personally could never take back someone who is messing around behind my back. It would make me feel like a coward. But thats just me.

Remember that your young and you have plenty of time to find the right girl.

 

[LUBaseball2]

you broke the golden rule ... treat them like dirt they stick like mud...

 

[toomanymustangs]

Wow too many on here to quote but def. good advice. Every guy needs to go through this to become a man. The break up with your first love hurts the worst and teaches you the most.

Someone else said it but its worth repeating-begging? come on dude. Desperation is the least attractive thing to a woman.

 

[chrisheltra]

I say you find a skank and make a dirty movie and email it to your ex after you return all her stuff and change the locks.

 

[sunburned]

She changed her mind about the relationship, it's a done deal. Just move on. She got a bunch of attention at the bar and all of a sudden said "what am I doing in a relationship when all these guys want me?"

I did the same thing in my last relationship. After 1.5 yrs or so, fighting and just generally not getting along, I decided I didn't want to be in a relationship anymore and wanted to go out and have fun. Not necessarily do every girl I met, but just live my own life and have fun for a change. My gf turned a complete 180 and changed her entire outlook. All of a sudden I was the one and she was thinking about our future and she was at my beck and call for everything. But it was too late, my mind was made up and nothing she did could change it.


It sucks man, but you are probably for the better. I was 25 when all that happened too and had been in a relationships back to back for almost 4 years. It's fun to be single again, believe me. Go out and enjoy your life and spend your money on you for a change without someone else sucking the dough out of your account.

 

[4valvemach]

My "friend" likes going for girls that have a man at home waiting for them.

With that said the "needs space", "my heart is in it but not my mind","I just need some time apart" are things those girls would say/text to the guy waiting at home.It sure sounds like she has feelings for someone else or a different kind of life than what it is now.

She could also be pregnant with another mans baby and does not know what to tell you :shrug:

 

[01cobravortech]

OP...you are living with a woman that you are just dating. There is no commitment in your relationship and when you have that kind of a foundation well you are going to be caught up in these kind of situations. Unfortunately, a lot of guys today kid themselves believing that because a girl lives with you that it equates to her making a commitment. You need to value yourself a little more too. If a woman continues to treat you the way she has been treating you, then you need to realize that love doesn't behave that way and its time to move on. It is not normal to constantly have disagreements and hostilities in a relationship. And guys that think it is are in a dysfunctional relationship and it will never last. There are so many good women out there that it baffles me why you would want to put yourself in a stressful situation like this. People lose their health all the time because of stress like this and this is no way to live.

 

[Fordman9870]

send her a letter like this...
Funny divorce letter to ex-wife : theCHIVE

 

[4valvemach]

op...you are living with a woman that you are just dating. There is no commitment in your relationship and when you have that kind of a foundation well you are going to be caught up in these kind of situations. Unfortunately, a lot of guys today kid themselves believing that because a girl lives with you that it equates to her making a commitment. You need to value yourself a little more too. If a woman continues to treat you the way she has been treating you, then you need to realize that love doesn't behave that way and its time to move on. It is not normal to constantly have disagreements and hostilities in a relationship. And guys that think it is are in a dysfunctional relationship and it will never last. There are so many good women out there that it baffles me why you would want to put yourself in a stressful situation like this. People lose their health all the time because of stress like this and this is no way to live.

^^+15131313213549654635

 

[L8APEX]

I stopped reading when I read "nurse".

I knew the story was going to get crazy when I read "nurse", the nuttiest girls and biggest bitches I meet are nurses, and they are completely irrational. I hear "I'm a nurse/ becoming a nurse and now I RUN."
Most I have met like the idea of "being smarter" than the men they go out with and when they learn that you are a potential "threat" to their "mental monopoly" they get crazy pissed, like you just got done lighting the fuse on their tampon pissed.
I'm sure there are exceptions to the rule but this is just my experience, and I worked in hospitals across the nation for 3 years...

With women nowadays it seems to be "Smart, Sexy, Sane, pick two- well now it seems like your lucky to even get to pick just one"

I think age comes into play as well. 25+ year olds are all too often different people compared to themselves when they were 20.

Sadly, your going to have to cut the line on this "fish" even though she still has your favorite lure stuck in her mouth. I'm sorry but the girl you fell for is gone buddy.

 

[tdschst]

So I went to the bar with my friend Sam (girl) for her darts game. She asked me to come, she's like a sis. Got to talking to this girl Nicole, she said you gonna take my number or what, I gave her my phone and got it. Tried to give her a ride home but she said no and that she is staying by her friends. I offer to stay by me and she says she doesn't do that the first night but to text or call her. Good looking girl 5'2-3 maybe 100 lbs. I actually miss being single now lol. Thanks for the help you guys, really put me in a better mood. Past few days I go from a oh I miss her mood, to F her, to an eh oh well mood. This really helps. BTW she (Liz) text me tonight and here was our convo:

Her: Just a heads up I'm calling Com Ed tomorrow to have the electric taken out of my name
Me: You can pick up your stuff tomorrow. I'll have it bagged up
Her: Keep it
Me: Ok well it's going in the dumpster tomorrow then
Me: I want the key too. You can just slide it under the door if you'd like
Her: I told you I don't want you touching my stuff. I'll come get it when you aren't there
Me: You just said keep it?
Me: I'd prefer someone be there when you get it. I don't trust you
Her: OK I'll bring Tanya
Me: Ok
Me: Get it tomorrow or it'll be outside
Her: Ok
Her: It'll be around 11