Yeah, it can be disheartening seeing some 7 year old Bangladeshi girl flawlessly playing Eric Johnson's Cliffs of Dover on a $35 guitar and a $15 amp. Just goes to show ya that the talent is in the fingers, not the instrument! I think I'm gonna go sell all my stuff NOW... Lol!!!
-Satch
Bingo. Plus, more "tone" is generated by the fretting and picking method than anything else. I remember the exact moment I realized this- 8 years ago, I bought a Pod UX2 interface and got into the world of VSTs. Aside from the obvious effect that EQ has, I noticed that I was able to make almost every amp model sound about the same by playing the same. It was disappointing- I had the notion that simply changing amp style made the music sound like specific artists. To really get a specific guitarist's "voice," you have to physically play like them, not just hit the notes or have the same amp. That doesn't happen by buying an expensive guitar or amp.
One of my warmup exercises is the 1st solo in Crystal Planet by... Joe Satriani. I helps me "calibrate" bends and loosen my fingers up. When I first played it and hit all the notes, I noticed it sounded nothing like Satch. It took a while to work out the little nuances, and I still don't have it perfect.
Another good example is one of my favorites- Devin Townsend. I was watching a video tutorial he had where he explained how he controlled the sound through pick attack and angle (nothing new, but he explained it really well). I hadn't thought of it before- sometimes it was just a natural, subconscious technique. He also explained how he has the drum hits strike a few ms premature to accentuate the guitar "chunkiness."